Still Single?

Wednesday, July 4, 2007


I was going to write a nice, long, funny post about my hell week of last - it wasn't truly hell but it was in a "ha ha I'm in Hell" funny kinda way.

Anyway, that will have to wait because I just arrived home from work, sweating from the bleeping sunshine that has FINALLY shone upon my rainy city, and came across this letter (see above) stuck under my door.

I thought perhaps I should address this...

NO. I am not still single.

If Facebook is any indicator, I am in a relationship as of Canada Day (July 1st).

I'm not going to go into too much detail because I don't think it's fair to the Rockstar - but I will say a few choice things to satisfy your appetite.

I met him a little more than a month ago, during that horrible night I had where I got really drunk and upset and cried all the way home after the bar. I was originally at the bar to see a friend of mine from highschool since it was her birthday and all and Facebook united us. This was my first time drinking since the horrible break-up, do keep in mind. Anyhoo, I had been on a few dates with that REALLY GOOD-LOOKING GUY whom had given me the creeps in an underlying way and as soon as he found out that I was drunk and out at a bar downtown, he decided to come down.

I wasn't too happy about this - yes, the attention from him was flattering but at this point my highschool friend had introduced me to her good friend, Rockstar. Now....I was drunk and he does look exactly like Ferris Bueller (at least, I think so) so even though I didn't know the guy at all, I got up and yelled, "Oh My GOD! It's Ferris Bueller!"

Apparently he gets that a lot and we joked a bit about me being in Newlyweds, yadda yadda. Anyway, there were lots of other guys around the bar that night too and I was having a good time, but for some reason I just started gravitating towards Rockstar. I had felt like I had known him all my life - even though a relationship at this point was the furthest thing in my mind. That came to be the truth later when REALLY GOOD-LOOKING GUY showed up and him and I went to another bar. In the midst of making out and being groped on the street (I was drunk) I suddenly realized how "un-safe" and vulnerable I was - physically and emotionally. That led to me running away from REALLY GOOD-LOOKING CREEPY GUY and all the way home.

On that weepy stumble, as you all know, I was this close to drunk dialing my Ex. I don't think I really missed him but he was familiar and comfortable and made me feel safe. Anyway, as you know, I didn't call him (THANK GOD). But a funny thing was, that right before I passed out, alone in my own bed, I thought about Rockstar. And how even though I didn't know him, that felt familiar, comfortable and safe too.

The next day - and the next week - that followed were the worst. I was at my lowest point and two of my friends abandoned me when I needed them most. I caved in and emailed the Ex. He was as supportive as he could be - but deep down I could tell that his whole "I'm always friends with my Exes" was a load of horseshit (don't worry, I don't think he reads my blog anymore). I could tell he was happy to be rid of me and once I accepted that, I finally began to move on.

Now my intention was not to move on (or *ahem* under) another man. I was quite content being single as I knew I would be. But the more I stayed in contact with Rockstar, the more I felt....something.

There were several reasons - of course - that kept me from persuing anything. Number one is that he is 16 months younger than me - but as I got to know him I could see what a mature, old soul he really is. Number two, he's in a band. I am soooo not a groupie - I dated guitarists all throughout high school and was not looking into that scene again. Number three, I didn't think we had anything in common - but it turns out we do, in fact, and what we don't is made up for by having this amazing chemistry. Number four, I had just gotten out of a serious (well, what I thought was serious, it obviously never was in hindsight) relationship. This was the big one. Was two months enough time? Was I truly over my Ex? Was I doing this for all the right reasons?

The answer was YES. To all of them.

So here I am. In a relationship with a guy who makes me laugh like no one else ever has. Who makes me feel GIDDY - in such a way that I don't think I have ever felt this way about anyone (of course, I am jinxing it now ;) Who actually WANTS to see me and drives 45 minutes just to and doesn't complain about it- how wonderful to feel wanted for a change. Who sends me texts throughout the day that makes me grin from ear-to-ear which causes my co-workers to wonder what's wrong with me. We even went to the same high school, his dad and my dad play golf together on a regular basis (and always have) and his best friend is the son of my mother's best friend. Weird, huh?

Anyway, I said this would be brief but I so just totally lied to you all. But you know what, I'm as happy as Paris Hilton right now and I'm just making up for lost time.

Oh...and there are a few more things (good things) that are going on but I'll have to do that later. This is too much for one day :)

BTW - I would totally upload my photos from my Canada Day weekend (and the boy) but I can't find them. Anyone else who is remotely interested, can mosey on down to my Facebook. I know there is a link to it somewhere....
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